What If?

In recent days I've done some minor emotional “spring cleaning” and I feel better because of it. I was explaining this "spring cleaning" to a friend, her retort was kind and understanding and then she followed it with something that made me feel a little awkward. she expressed her "wanting" of me. I played it off as nicely as I could telling her that while she was a "nice and charming girl but (you’ve got to love the “but” comments), I'm beyond happy with someone else" this only prompted her response of "Haven't you ever said ‘what if we were together?’". I answered truthfully and told her "no, I don't care about what if, I'm beyond happy with what IS" this caused her to be taken back a bit and told me that who I was with was the "luckiest girl". While I disagree with the luckiest girl comment (because I'm not without flaws), but her previous "what if" statement prompted a thought in my head.

Is “what if?” a legitimate thing to even say?As people we are the same at the core, we all feel, we all react, we all have emotion, but it is in the things that MAKE us feel, react that make us individuals.

Hear me out, The lovely girl I’m with now makes me feel incredible. I’m inspired, I’m happy and I feel wonderful just thinking and typing about her. She evokes thoughts of the future and the steps I want to take to get there. That is “what IS” I don’t second guess it because that truly is what is. The friend on the other hand, doesn’t evoke or cause these sort of reactions or feelings…that is also what IS.

See. There isn’t what if, only what is.

In conclusion, I know I can’t say “what if” with conviction because I already have my “what is”, I implore you to do the same, go out and search for your “what is”. You’ll wake up with that smile on your face, that warmth in your chest and that drive to be the best possible version of yourself.

Forever adoring what is
Thing 2

Changes

For better or for worse a person, a place, a memory and even a feeling can change. Now there is no way for us to know when or IF something or someone will ever change, but that's not what I want to talk about. I want to talk about how to deal with a change, sudden or gradual, big or small and how we can take our own steps in changing ourselves.

For many years, more than I care to remember, I walked down the same path over and over again. It was a path of the same type of relationship, the same boring job, the same situations and the same boring results. And a few months ago after a emotional breakdown I came together, and took the steps onto a new path that I had to change myself.

See while I couldn't see it myself for the longest time, I eventually found that we can't just glide along this life, we need to change it for ourselves, or at least push ourselves until we can't push no more. Otherwise what's the point? Where do we really end up if we don't head somewhere ourselves? I'm not asking you to rush through life but I'm saying that you need to know who you want, what you want and where you want to be and then you act accordingly.

I found all of those things, I'm 20 years old, I'm still young, I have time to make this happen, and I intend to take each step down this path with a determination and fight that won't be matched. I say let us all do the same.

Forever Thoughtful
Thing 2